Woo! Why am I saying woo? Today we talk about nationalism. And Samurai! And Daimyo! Yay! Oh, and why I was saying woo is because I held my breath for 1 min and I had to catch my breath, "takes breath", "woo".
That last sentence, count how many words it has! It's the first coincidence in this wonderful blog!
Ieyasu was the emperor!
The Tokugawa era was amazing. It started the special forces of the Japanese army, the Samurai.
The Daimyo had full control over the crops! So they were better than samurai.
Japanese hated foreign European Christians. The hate was amazing. If any christian sets foot on Japan, they will be slaughtered! You think that's too much? I don't think so.
Japanese were awesome! They invented amazing rifles, including the Arisaka, the Type 99 and the Type 100.
WWII in a nutshell. Nazis were all like "Hail mein fuhrer", Russians were all like "Destroy the mudak fascists!" Americans were all like "Hamburgers, haircuts, mayo, hungry!" Japanese were all like "Hey can we bomb pearl harbor Kthx."
Many people find comfort in inaccuracy. Like me. I am one of the most inaccurate history teachers ever.
Nationalism can be bad! Like when it hit the Japanese emperor! Dat,, mein freund, is how WWII started for the Mayo-Eaters and the Japs.
Tojo! The emperor's name was Tojo! Japs, I'm bringing it back.
Japs: Don't bring it back!
Me: Well too bad.
There are 2 Matthew Perries in the world. 1 is an amazing comedian. 1 forcibly opened European trade in Japan.
Disgraced Samurai can commit suicide. But they do it in a fancy way! First, they wash themselves. Then, they eat their favorite food like "UM NUM NUM". Then, here comes the bloody part, they place a awesome knife on their table, covered up in a not bloody cloth. But don't worry, it'll get bloody soon! Next up, they stab themselves in a gut, and then, of course, in a fancy way, their buddy cuts off their head, ninja style. And then blood goes all over the place, ruining their awesome suit, and everything else! OH MY GOD! BLOOD EVERYWHERE! BLOODY BLOODY BLOOD! ERMAGHERD! "Fancy Cough" That's how they kill themselves. It's called by a geeky name, Seppuku. GEEKY!
Oh and PEGI 18 Fun Fact! Do not read if under 18! Actually, I'm under 18, so go ahead: Tentacle Rape was a real myth in Ancient Japan. Not kidding bro. Truly not kidding.
Nationalism is weird. It's like we are just part of our country! Just a cell in our country team! I say no! Unacceptable! UNACCEPTABLE! GTFO NAZIS, GTFO ANY NATIONALIST, I WANT TO BE FREE! FREE LIKE A LITTLE BIRD! HECK, MAYBE I'D KILL MY COUNTRY IF IT WAS ALIVE! LIKE A CANCEROUS CELL TO THE NATIONALISTS, LIKE A REBEL! REVOLT REVOLT REVOLT!
That above there is not my way of view. Some crazy guy stole my computer and typed that in. After that he pulled a pistol up and shot a bird out of the sky. And then he ate it. And choked on it's bones. And then I called him F-ed up. Literally. Haha, you think that was really true? Loser. It was me that wrote that! Just wanted to raise some controversy so more people would read my blog!
Kekekekekekekeke....... And that's why every time a bunch of opium is put in a house it's called an opium bar! Wait, no relation. Sorry.
Nationalism and communism are not similar. AT ALL. Seriously. They might sound similar but they are not! In games, they both are enemies, but they are NOT related! I repeat, NOT related!
Pennsylvania is the hardest state to pronounce. Pencil-vae-nea.
Forty Two! The two in there is the 42nd word in this paragraph of history. But you don't know that.
Europeans are awesome. I am half Jap and half NZ, so I think Europeans and Japs are awesome, because "Hey Japanese, have some muskets."
Without that, this would not be possible (see bottom picture)
Gun Samurai are awesome. Those jimmyjacks are awesome! BTW, jimmyjack is my way of saying sharpshooter. Jimmy= Accurate Jack= Jackass
They are Jackasses because they annoy their enemies by taking them down from afar with guns! Bang, babang. Bang bang bang bang bang bang bang bang bang bang! ERMAGHERD WE'RE DYING! AAAH AAAH AAAAAAAAAAAAAH! OH MY GOD!
USSR is not a country anymore. Nor is south Vietnam. And sorry, Rhodesia, you're out too. There are so many countries.
All my globes are out of date. They both don't have south Sudan.
Nationalism is amazing, as people want to become their own country right? South Sudan is now it's own country. South Vietnam tried to become a country. They failed because of those damn Victor Charlies. I hate Victor Charlies. Open fire on the Victor Charlies! Victor Charlies = Viet Cong. Read some books. Or even better, play some COD-BO
My brother is dividing his nationalism into two parts, so get ready for it. Please.
Matthew Perry is evil! I hate Matthew Perry. But the comedian is pretty good. But I hate the other Matthew Perry! Why did you introduce Christianity! We could go so well without Christianity! Us Japanese could take over the world! Trust me, with Japanese taking over the world, you'd be seeing a lot of awesome stuff around.
Good Day and Good Bye to you sir! See you next week!
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